I wish I were a Plumber
Had I been a smart girl I would have skipped secondary school and gone straight to vocational school to become a plumber. Instead, I was a dumbass and got excellent grades - I mean, grades, what are they good for? Who gives a flying Dutchman?- then I got even more stupid and went ahead and got an edumacation, in ARTS of all useless things!
Seriously. Arts.
When did you ever hear anyone screaming "Help! We need someone to analyze this text!"?
Didn't think so.
Yes, yes, humanity needs art to evolve blah blah.
Just think of all the things I could have accomplished if I had become a plumber. Firstly, no student loans (being that in the country I was in at the time, vocational school was free). I could have entered the work force at 19 instead of being a useless, whiny kid until, well, now, my early thirties (barring some years in my twenties spent hurling drinks at people, very useful).
Secondly, I would have paid lots of taxes by now, not to mention lots and lots into a decent retirement fund. The way things look now I will be eating nothing but Ramen noodles in my old age, while being audited by the tax authorities for the 43rd time.
Thirdly, I could remodel our bathroom and fix the leaking faucet in the kitchen.
Agent Language Genius and I have discussed this quite a bit. ALG even went so far as to secure herself a trainee spot in a plumbing company. Unfortunately, the company was situated in the American South and she finally had to come to terms that even with the lure of a free trainee placement, she would never last in the Bible Belt.
Despite our different backgrounds we realize that we were both fooled by the academic dream. In our childhood we were often told that academic success was the only measure of a person's intelligence. Not so much by our families - even though they did their fair share of preaching- but as much by the school environment and society in general. I even have friends my age who seriously believe that their college degree means they are somehow smarter than others, yet they cannot pay their own credit card bills. One of them uttered the classic "If everybody could go to college, then everybody would have better jobs and make more money"...That is fantastic, but who is left to clean the streets? Drive cabs? Attend to your every whim at the department stores? How about making sure they get decently paid for the work they do instead?
Those who are academically curious will go to college anyway.
Alas, therein lies my Catch 22. As much as I love fixing things and puttering about, as much do I love being a good student. Argh.
However, right now, I really really wish I were a plumber so I could build us a new bathroom without risking the lives of innocent people.
Seriously. Arts.
When did you ever hear anyone screaming "Help! We need someone to analyze this text!"?
Didn't think so.
Yes, yes, humanity needs art to evolve blah blah.
Just think of all the things I could have accomplished if I had become a plumber. Firstly, no student loans (being that in the country I was in at the time, vocational school was free). I could have entered the work force at 19 instead of being a useless, whiny kid until, well, now, my early thirties (barring some years in my twenties spent hurling drinks at people, very useful).
Secondly, I would have paid lots of taxes by now, not to mention lots and lots into a decent retirement fund. The way things look now I will be eating nothing but Ramen noodles in my old age, while being audited by the tax authorities for the 43rd time.
Thirdly, I could remodel our bathroom and fix the leaking faucet in the kitchen.
Agent Language Genius and I have discussed this quite a bit. ALG even went so far as to secure herself a trainee spot in a plumbing company. Unfortunately, the company was situated in the American South and she finally had to come to terms that even with the lure of a free trainee placement, she would never last in the Bible Belt.
Despite our different backgrounds we realize that we were both fooled by the academic dream. In our childhood we were often told that academic success was the only measure of a person's intelligence. Not so much by our families - even though they did their fair share of preaching- but as much by the school environment and society in general. I even have friends my age who seriously believe that their college degree means they are somehow smarter than others, yet they cannot pay their own credit card bills. One of them uttered the classic "If everybody could go to college, then everybody would have better jobs and make more money"...That is fantastic, but who is left to clean the streets? Drive cabs? Attend to your every whim at the department stores? How about making sure they get decently paid for the work they do instead?
Those who are academically curious will go to college anyway.
Alas, therein lies my Catch 22. As much as I love fixing things and puttering about, as much do I love being a good student. Argh.
However, right now, I really really wish I were a plumber so I could build us a new bathroom without risking the lives of innocent people.
posted by disinterpreter at 7:23 PM
3 Comments:
Good to have you back, Elin!
Last year a minor tabloid sensation was sparked by a biochemist with a doctorate and involved in cancer research quitting academia to retrain as a gas-fitter because he would earn over twice as much in switching professions. This says it all about the value attached to intellectual pursuits in Great Briti-stan. This is why, even though I would like to quit my intellectually stultifying job I have too much of a sense of responsibility to plunge my dependents into instant poverty (being able to afford to buy shelf after shelf of books from amazon and pay off the mortgage is just too tempting). So I keep my hand in by giving conference papers and publishing articles, half in one world, half in the other, belonging to neither. Of course, even if I did return to the groves of academe I would not be able to devote myself entirely to research, so, all in all, the lure of Waffleland is greater.
Snowflakes drift down outside as I sip my morning coffee. A later start this morning...commuting in by train rather than bus.
Don't feel bad about career choices. I got my BS degree in Chemistry, went into the Navy and became a Nuclear Power Officer (Navy paid for college and I owed them), got out and became a chemist again, got laid off and couldn't find a job, went back to school to be a computer geek, and am now in a fullfilling job running a help desk. The moral of the story is it took me 10 years after getting out of college to figure out what I really wanted to do with my life and another 3 years to make any decent money at it. There is hope that you'll have the job of your dreams.
Yeah, it's bizarre, this whole job thing, I love what I trained to do but hate my job situation and I am not ambitious enough at all.
Then again I really wish I had more of a useful existence, such as fixing things or fixing people or saving the world. Right now I feel a tad useless.
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