Free Advice
Last time I was in New York, we took a walk through Central Park. There were the usual suspects: roller-bladers, kids, dogs, tourists and various stands offering roasted nuts, pretzels and free advice. I really wanted to stop by the free advice stand and ask them what to do with my life. But as I was with a group of people, I felt too embarrassed.
Half an hour ago I glanced through the latest issue of Psychology Today and saw a little snippet on these people offering free advice in NYC.
Here is my problem: I have always been good at giving advice, yet I have never thought of using this skill for anything else than annoying my friends.
I am not a licensed therapist nor a member of the clergy, but my mom and step dad often used me as their designated referee. Yeah, they did end up divorcing, but that is what I told them when I was nine, they just didn't listen.
From now on you can ask me anything you want and I will give you advice.
Ask away.
Half an hour ago I glanced through the latest issue of Psychology Today and saw a little snippet on these people offering free advice in NYC.
Here is my problem: I have always been good at giving advice, yet I have never thought of using this skill for anything else than annoying my friends.
I am not a licensed therapist nor a member of the clergy, but my mom and step dad often used me as their designated referee. Yeah, they did end up divorcing, but that is what I told them when I was nine, they just didn't listen.
From now on you can ask me anything you want and I will give you advice.
Ask away.
posted by disinterpreter at 2:35 PM
3 Comments:
Ok, you want to give advice, then tell my how to get my wife to realize it is no big deal if she has small breasts. I really don't care and think she looks great as is. She's a little hottie but doesn't think my opinion counts since we're married. Any thoughts?
Hi Sydwynd,
Congrats on being the first to be subjected to my irrational advice!
First of all: it's not about the boobs. I know this makes no sense, but it really isn't.
Is she happy at work? At home? What are her friends like? Are they true friends? Or are they just there for the shopping, but not the support?
I trust my husband implicitly, and as long as he loves me the way that I am, I know I'm good to go. But ever so often I get ridiculously retarded and hung up on the size of my arse, thighs, tummy -whatever and nothing he says makes any difference. But rarely is the true cause of my "blahs" truly because of the way I look. It has much more to do with what else is going on in my life.
I have met many women who have had "work done" and not one of them has struck me as being happier for it. Implants give me the heebee-jeebies, they look scary upclose, like there is an alien trapped under the skin. From what I understand they are also unnaturally "perky" in horisontal positions. Eeeek.
But until you have figured out what might be really bugging her, there are a few things that you can either tell her, or at least tell yourself while she is complaining:
a. Clothes look WAY better on smaller chested women. All big time fashion models have small boobs.
b. Is there anything sexier than not wearing a bra? Those of us who are well endowed can never pull off that backless/braless look with out major contraptions. Let me tell you, nipples and duct tape, not fun.
c. Having men listen to you instead of looking at your chest must be refreshing.
d. It is our duty to love our body, it carries us through our life. Not loving it is like spitting life in the face. When I say love I don't mean a free for all chocolate fest downed with Veuve Cliquot, I mean love it as if it were your child.
e. If all of the above fails, just get her pregnant ASAP and keep her pregnant and breast feeding for like, I dunno, the next 15 years. Not only is it a guaranteed boob enlarger but it will keep her so busy and exhausted she won't have time to think about the size of her bosom.
Elin,
Thanks for the advise. I do my best to reassure her and her feelings on implants are the same as yours. Option 5, while appealing for boob size, has the unpleasant side effect of more littles ones to care for. We've decided our family is the perfect size right now, so while practicing getting pregnant sounds good, I think I'll decline trying that option.
BTW, great site. I like to find refreshing points of view.
Vince
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